Making Good Friends

Making Good Friends

You know that song that gets stuck in your head all day? Like the Friends theme song:

“I’ll be there for you, when the rain starts to pour. I’ll be there for you, like I’ve been there before. I’ll be there for you, ‘cause you’re there for me too.”

When you read the lyrics, who comes to mind?

I’m reminded of my elementary friends. We found each other based on common interests, being in the same class, and arranged play dates. I picked them, I liked them, and I wanted to do stuff with them.

I was blessed with empowering, healthy relationships.

In High School I hung out in a group. These were the BEST years. We spent our time driving around in a mini van. We loved to play Pull Shovel. This typically ended up with us in trouble.

Picture it:

• A major highway with a cornfield on both sides

• A van full of teens parks on the gravel side road

• Everyone piles out of the van

• Someone has a brand new shovel

• They tie a rope to the shovel and set it next to the highway

• Then everyone hides in the field anxiously wait for a vehicle to stop

• Vehicle stops

• The unsuspecting driver gets out, spying a shovel.

• He reaches down to grab

• The teens pull the shovel away and run like you-know-what into the field.

• The poor unsuspecting soul hops back in the vehicle empty handed

It was innocent fun, and we had a lot of it.

I was blessed with empowering, healthy relationships.

Recently I visited with a college friend. We discussed how, if we had to pick another time in life to be quarantined, it would be college. Rent was under $200, we had a deep freeze in the living room, and all spare time and money went toward everything social.

I don’t see these friends often, but when we talk, it feels like we haven’t skipped a beat.

I was blessed with empowering, healthy relationships.

My adult friendships are deep. They’re my girls now. They’ve seen me at my best, and they’ve been at my side when I could barely pick myself up. We’ve been together through getting married, having children, getting jobs, and all the things in between. They’re my Thelma friends, and I’m Louise.

I’m sure glad my friends don’t come with price tags. I’d never be able to afford them.

“I am blessed with empowering, healthy relationships.”

It’s very Oola to have a support system outside of family.

Unfortunately, not all friendships are healthy. I’ve had to end some toxic friendships.

Oola teaches us to cut the toxic out. When toxicity is removed and boundaries are set, there is more energy to pour into healthy relationships.

A true friend is someone who has your back, keeps promises, doesn’t lead or follow, but walks with you. True friendships are valuable and deep. They’re also a whole lot of fun.

I’m grateful for all my friendships, even those that have ended. I’ve learned lessons from each one.

Why not scroll back up to the top. Sing that song once more, and reflect on your friend circle.

Would they run through a cornfield with you?

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Written by Tanya Gilberts (Certified Oola Life Coach). You can email her at and find her on Facebook at